大哥

this used to be the in thing...

called the 大哥大... LOL...

now it's no longer craze by most of the people...

yet the title 大哥 still widely used...

i guess besides the eldest in the family...

people use it as a form of respect..

or trying to be respectful...

or trying to help to break a certain level of ice...

i use 大哥 to address some of the brothers in church...

basically to break some ice...

who likes to be called 小弟？

i started to use 师傅 recently (learn from my 师傅)

basically to reach the similar effect...

also a way to remind ourselves that we always learn from one another...

but recently someone was really offended by such 'title'...

so... i think i'll be very careful...

anyway, back to 大哥 a.k.a. big brother...

some regards me as the 大哥 in TnT...

some regards me as 大哥 because i have a little bit of wisdom...

really? am i wise? am i really leading the TnT? LOL

when i was younger, someone address me as kor-kor (哥哥)...

i was so uncomfortable.. so much so that every time i heard...

i will have 鸡皮疙瘩 (goosebumps)...

up till today, i still can't take it...

but as for 大哥... haha, i actually don't mind...

one of my best friends (Daniel) used to call me 大哥...

we (just 3 of us) formed a circle of 文人 (LOVL)

and just because i was the oldest, they address me as 大哥

seriously, i don't like such way of addressing and viewing..

coz it sounded so old, yet somehow it gives me a little bit comfort...

at least i am contributing to someone's life...

but... who am i? just doing my best, still trying to reach my best...

i dare not, would not want such 'title'...

less i'd be proud and haughty...

just 'nigel' or 'boonfei' or 'ah boon' or 'ah fei'...

basically, just my name would do...

BUT...

pls don't 连名带姓... LOL....

i just don't like it :p